First mama post!

This is my first post on mama stuff, so I feel I should give some background and stats on the pregnancy thus far.

First, we discovered - by an impulsive jolt to the drug store - that we're pregnant, on January 8th. A couple weeks prior to taking said test, I had been feeling..'not quite right'. My body just felt odd, in the digestive sense. I was constipated, bloated, gassy and just plain miserable. I chalked it up to the fact that, while Michael's mom was visiting at the end of December, not only did I drink more tea and coffee than water, I also found it difficult (as I usually do in the company of "outsiders") to poop (sorry if you don't like the word..we're very comfortable, here at Casa Hord, speaking freely of bodily functions). Even in the comfort of my own home. But, the discomfort carried on long enough that I started to wonder... Before really figuring out when my last period was, I assumed the next was on its way the week of the 5th, because I was feeling all of the symptoms I normally felt the first day (lower back pain, breast tenderness, etc.). When Wednesday came, and my period didn't, I was experiencing some extreme pain due to the constipation. At the same time, I actually did the period math and realized that I was a week early in my thinking, and that I was in fact not due for it as I'd thought.

I made an appointment for the following Friday to get a vaginal exam done, since I haven't had one in about three years (I know). We were a bit concerned that all of this pain and stuff was related to something in that arena. Thursday came, and I was still feeling pretty rotten. When Michael came home, I said to him that perhaps we should get a pregnancy test anyway, even though I wasn't technically "late". He proceeded to tell me (grinning from ear to ear) that he very nearly stopped on the way home and picked one up. (I guess we both "felt" something) We decided that we would go out together, after my coffee date with a girlfriend that evening, and get a test. (This particular girlfriend, of course, told me at coffee that she was absolutely convinced I was pregnant -- before I even mentioned the idea; apparently my "habits" had started to change...)

When I came home, Michael had gone out and gotten a test as a surprise. And a lollipop. (if you're an avid Friends watcher, as we are, you get the reference) I hurried into the bathroom, and he after me, and I peed on the stick. I set the stick down on the edge of the bathtub, and no more than pulled my pants up, and looked down to see that the ClearBlue test did in fact say, "Pregnant". (!) I looked at Michael, as he was reading all of the info included in the test box, and asked what the likelihood was of a false positive. He looked at me, and upon immediately reading my face, looked down at the test and started jumping up and down. He had the cutest, yet strangest, look on his face...one that I can honestly say I had never seen before. It was the look of a very contented papa, absolutely surprised, elated, scared and giddy - all wrapped in one facial expression. We hugged each other, while he couldn't stop hopping up and down - so we were essentially hug-hopping (a new term; feel free to use it) for about a minute. Then we stopped, looked at each other, speechless, almost in tears and trying to catch our breath. From that moment on, Micheal has been a beaming papa.

I, on the other hand, am understandably all over the place. Due to hormones and exhaustion and the fluctuations of constipation and gas, not to mention breast tenderness of a level I've never felt before (did someone use my breasts as punching bags while I was sleeping last night!?!), I was really in a different place about the whole thing every other day for about a week and a half. And, of course, I'm terrified of the idea that I may miscarry (evidently there's a 20% chance in the first trimester).

A saving grace came by way of an email from one of Mike's wonderful cousins, Chris. She had emailed me, asking if/when it would be appropriate to send a gift. We exchanged emails, and after I had expressed my concern, she gave me some very inspirational words that have stuck with me ever since. That was, basically, that I need to embrace this right now and love this little one no matter the outcome. And that this baby already loves me more than anyone ever could. As I'm writing this I'm nearly in tears, as I was when I first read her words. And so, as much as I know it's still a possibility, I'm choosing to love and embrace being pregnant, no matter the outcome. I feel much more at peace these days, especially the farther along we get.

So, that brings us to just how far along we are. According to the ultrasound we had on the 27th, we are now in our 8th week. I think. It's hard to actually say what week, because the ultrasound tech said "5-6" weeks then, so this week we would be "7-8" weeks. Do we just call it whatever we want? If so, I say 8. I'm assuming that with the exam on the 20th of this month, we'll have a clearer answer. By then, we should 10 weeks along!

I'm not starting to show, per se, except that I look fatter in the middle. It's difficult to say, however, since I had started to gain some "Winter weight" almost simultaneously. I'm going to be straight and honest here on my blog, as much as I possibly can, so that I may help and encourage other women. I think we, women, have enough issues with body image and what is the "right weight" to begin with, without bringing all of that into our pregnancies. Don't get me wrong, it's about being healthy and providing as good a beginning for your child as possible, and being too thin as well as too heavy can present problems. That said, I weighed in at the initial doctor's visit (to confirm the pregnancy) at 162 1/2 lbs. I was technically 3 weeks, so I'm calling that my start weight. Last week, at my labs, I weighed 166. I've already gained 3 1/2 pounds, which could be considered too much, but I'm not too worried about it. According to what I've read about weight gain in pregancy, there is a certain amount "expected" to be gained in the first trimester (2-4 lbs.). I think I'll be okay. I'm more concerned with exercise than I am with actual weight at this point. Spring cannot come quickly enough. I just want to get out and walk, walk, walk!! I am, and always have been, concerned about the girth of my lower body (butt and thighs), which is where the weight becomes an issue. Walking will help trim that portion of my body immensely. If, at my appointment next week, I weigh in any closer to 170 than I am, I'll discuss it with my midwife...

Who, I can't wait to meet, by the way! Evidently, Fairview has about as many midwives on staff as OB's. They all work at the birth center, and we feel very secure in the knowledge that they are backed by a University staff of OB's and surgeons. Oh, and they have the only male midwife in the state! (though, would he still have the title, 'midwife'?). How cool is that?

My tummy at 4 weeks. Keep in mind, if it looks like a pregnant tummy, it's probably due to the fact that I'm constantly bloated (distention due to constipation). And the fact that I had gained a
bout 5 lbs. of Winter insulation. It's clear, in this picure too, just how poor my posture is (I've always stood with my pelvic tilted forward, ever since I was a kiddo). I hope that doesn't cause undue discomfort later in pregnancy...